Silent Hill 2: I Forgot why I came here
by Jessie-V
Summary: James comes to silent hill. and forgets why he ever came. Nutcases all over. Only for the bringer of beer. and skittles. Rated for evil language.
1. Why did I come here again?

A/N: Okay the fic I tried of Resident evil sucked. Because 1: I never played the game! 2: never played it even more!! 3: Didn't have enough happy quotas to make more chapters! 4: I was lazy. So I present Silent hill 2, in my own crude and odd fashion. So don't mind me. Just read!  
  
- - - - - - - - - The Graveyard - - - - - - - - -  
  
James: Hmm....If my sense of direction is right...and the wind is going in the nowhere direction....silent hill should be right over.....THERE! *Points at the giant Denny's sign* ....Jesus since Mary took my map to her grave I haven't been able to find my way out of Denny's....I am so fricken lost....  
  
Mary:Jaaaames.....jaaaames....meet...mee...meeet...meee....  
  
James: WTF!? Where is that noise coming from? O.o; Better yet what does meat me mean? Mary? Could you really be in this god forsaken peanut shell?  
  
James skips along the fairy fog smoked roads of silent hill into the graveyard. Tripping over 24 graves until he finds a girl putting moustaches on the cement angels  
  
James: hmm...Police! PUT DOWN THE MUSTACHES! *Points a piece of cardboard at the girl*  
  
Girl: O-oh sorry. Was this someone you really cared about?  
  
James: Uhh...no...erm anyways did you notice it was really foggy  
  
Jessie: SHUT UP AND SAY THE LINES RIGHT!  
  
James: *Cowers in fear* Uhh...okay excuse me?  
  
Girl: I, I'm sorry...I, I... I was just....just....hahahaha!!!! I was defiling bodies that belonged to the zombies of this town and your wife is going to die because she's alive and I'm going to go insane and I'm going to set a staircase on fire and giggle and eat your brains and rape your corpse and Weeeeeeee!  
  
Jessie: O_O  
  
James: O_O  
  
Zombies: O_O!  
  
James: Yeah, I'm looking for Silent Hill......Is this the right way?  
  
Girl: (Giggle) Um yeah.... It's hard to see with this fog, but there's only the one road. You can't miss it. Bye funny lady I love you bai baaai! (She waved and continued to defile monuments and what not)  
  
James: What a coo coo nutcase...(Sniffle) I want my coco puffs!   
  
James walked and walked and walked...and beat up stuff. And walked until Jessie the magical fanfic writer of horribleness made James walk into an area of the street where there are long streaks of blood And it looks like a body has been drug across the ground  
  
James: Hmm...looks like a mass spaghetti-o's accident. Oh well. Tra-lala- lala. (Skips off)  
  
Camera zooms to show a strange form farther down the street walking away from James until it disappears into the fog  
  
James: Weeeee camera fun! (Runs after the shadow tra-la-la-la)  
  
James follows another set of blood streaks he finds further down the street Down into an alleyway and eventually ends up in some type of old, brick Edifice, which looks to be undergoing construction. He hears a radio making Strange noises within the construction site and picks it up to examine it. He eventually notices that the strange form he saw earlier in the street is In the construction area with him kneeling next to a dead body. As the Figure begins to walk towards James; he picks up a board with a nail in it And attacks the creature until it lays bleeding and motionless on the ground. James then examines the creature  
  
James: *screams like a five year old, then pokes the creature* Is it dead? What the hell is it? It's not human....maybe a type of Chessie. Or something...  
  
As James exits the construction area he remembers the radio he picked up and Takes it out of his jacket pocket in order to examine it  
  
James: w00t examining thingies!  
  
A very staticy female voices comes on the radio as James looks it over  
  
Voice: N....Na....chos.....J....ame...s... b.....ring.....na.....chos..... T....he.....na......cho......ja....me...s  
  
James: What the fook? Nachos? WHERE THE HELL AM I GOING TO FIND NACHOS!? (Stares at a 7-Eleven down the street,)  
  
Five minute later.  
  
James: (Stares at the radio) What the ...? I'd better take it anyway. I might need it for some zombie music later.  
  
======================= THE APARTMENTS =======================  
  
James sees a key lying on the ground, but has to stick his arm through a Metal bar partition in order to reach it  
  
James: Fooking key! I shall use the Jedi force to get it to come to me. Huyaaaaaa......cooooome...toooo....meeee.....(Reachs arm out)  
  
He is struggling to reach it when suddenly Someone on the other side of the bars kicks the key out of his reach and then Steps on James' hand.  
  
James: AHHHH ZOMBIE (Commences with the screaming of a five year old)  
  
Instead of a zombie. There was a nice blonde little girl. Tee hee. Zombie food.  
  
Little girl: Ha-ha!  
  
James: Hey wait you little bitch! I will give you such a wedgie if we run into each other again! COME BACK YOU FREAKING NUTCASE!  
  
The little girl runs down the dark hallway on the other side of the metal Bars until she disappears laughing her head off.  
  
James: Damn it, freaking nutcase kids.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - Room 208, Enter Eddie. - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
Once James enters the hallway of the second floor apartments after obtaining The handgun he hears a loud scream as he approaches the intersection of the Middle north-south and the east-west hallways.  
  
James: Weeeeee screaming and airplanes buzzzz! *Waves his arms like a bird*  
  
James then finds his way to room 208. There he finds a dead body sitting in front of a television. There is blood splattered across the corpses face and Body, as well as all over the television and part of the wall, and there was a bowl of uneaten cheesies.  
  
James: Oh my God.... Who could've.......WHO COULD'VE LEFT CHEESIES UNEATEN! (Insert girly scream here)  
  
James eventually makes his way to room 101 of the Woodside apartments. Once He enters he finds a dead body hanging out of the refrigerator in the Kitchen, he munches on his cheesie and kicks the fridge door closed mumbling through the cheesies  
  
James: Stupid hooligans leaving the fridge door open. Haven't they ever been taught about energy wasting?  
  
There is also the sound of someone being sick coming from one of the rooms Within the apartment. When James enters the bathroom of the apartment, he Finds a man throwing up into the bathroom toilet, James giggles at the sight of someone being sick.  
  
Man: It wasn't me! I didn't do it!  
  
James: huh? Do what? Who when where? What? O_o;  
  
Man: I didn't do anything. I, I swear! He was like this when I got here...  
  
James: My uh, my name's James. James Sunderland. Woo I eat nachos and kill zombies. What do you do?  
  
Man: Ummm... Eddie. O.x  
  
James: Eddie, who's that dead guy in the kitchen? And better yet. Would you like some cheesies? I found some in the other dead guy's house. =D  
  
Eddie: I didn't do it. I swear I didn't kill anybody.  
  
James: You're not friends with that red, pyramid thing, are you? Cause if you are. I'll have to throw a pie at you.  
  
Eddie: Red pyramid thing? I don't know what yer talkin' about.  
Honest. But I did see some weird-lookin' monsters.  
They scared the hell outta me, so I ran in here...  
  
James: (Giggle) and what happened after that? (He asked in a sigmen fraud kind of way) Ahem....err Well, I guess this place isn't too safe either. What happened here anyway?  
  
Eddie: Uh I, I told ya I don't know. I'm not even from this town. I just, I just...  
  
James: You too, huh. You ate a bad pizza? ^_^  
  
Eddie: Umm... yeah. You could say that... O_o  
  
James: Well whatever it is... I think you better get out of here soon. Go back home to your puppy dog and stuff. And yeah.  
  
Eddie: Puppy dog...uhh.....Yeah yer right. What about you?  
  
James: I'll leave as soon as I'm done here. Eddie... be killful. ^^  
  
Eddie: James, I... I... um... You be uhh...cheeseful. .  
  
James walks out of the bathroom then comes back in Blinking for a moment.  
  
James: Eddie, are you okay? Do you need a cheesie?  
  
Eddie: Yeah, I guess...(James gives him a cheesie)  
  
James eventually makes his way to the adjacent apartment building "Blue Creek Apartments". There, he walks into one of the bedrooms of apartment 109 And finds the girl he talked to earlier in the graveyard lying on the floor Holding a butcher knife and staring at herself in a mirror that takes up the Entire area of one of the walls.  
  
Girl: Oh... it's you.....cheesie man.  
  
James: Yeah... I'm James...I like bacon.  
  
Girl: Angela...the deaf. O.O Don't talk to me.  
  
James: Angela... okay. I don't know what you're planning... But there's  
Always another way.  
  
Angela: Really? But... You're the same as me. It's easier just to run.  
Besides, it's what we deserve; I want my ears cut off so I can't hear em trying to break down my door.  
  
James: No... I'm not like you. I'm like darth vaider. Luke. I am your father.  
  
Angela: (Goes into a sarcasm fit) Are you afraid?  
I, I'm sorry.  
  
James: It's okay... Did you find your mother? Brother? Sister? Doggy? Mommy?....cheesies....mmm...Skittles! (Runs around then sits down and looks at the girl)  
  
Angela: Not yet... She's not anywhere... she was so funny. Every time that daddy hit me she would chuckle. Then she got brutally murdered and now she sent me a letter saying to meet her in our specia-  
  
James: HEY stop reading my letter. Anyways... Did she live in this apartment building? Better yet. Did she "JUMP" off of this apartment building?  
  
Angela: I don't know...  
  
James: So all you know is she lived in this town? Do you have anymore cheesies? (Waves bowl of emptiness around)  
  
Angela: What did you say? How do you know that? (She glared at him not blinking...for two seconds, then blink) ARGH.  
  
James: I WON! Wooo.....Well... I just figured, cause this is where you're looking for her. How else would I know?  
  
Angela: Yeah.....Skittles! weeeeee!.....mommy. (Sucks on her thumb)  
  
James: Am I right? Tell me I'm right? Hey don't look tired! NOOOOOOO  
  
Angela: I'm so tired...what is that a problem cheesie man?  
  
James: So why did you come to this town anyway? (Munches on a bag that had once contained skittles)  
  
Angela: ...I, I'm sorry. Did you find... the person you're looking for? Tell me or I'll make sure an ice pick up your nose! GIMMIE A PICTURE! AHHHHHH......go on. ^_^  
  
James: Not yet....O_O  
  
James pulls out a picture of his lovely wif- a girl that appears to have been a zombie stripper at Heaven's Night.  
  
James: Oops (Quickly puts it back in his wallet then grabs another picture of a windy old bat who looks sick, or Mary as people would know.) Her name's Mary. She's my wife...and the bringer of beer. =D  
  
Angela looks at the picture and shakes her head indicating that she does not recognize Mary  
  
Angela: I'm sorry....I removed half of my brain with memories of that bitch. :D  
  
James: It's okay. Anyway, she's dead. I don't know why I think she's here. I'm thinking she has my nacho's held hostage.  
  
Angela: ...She's dead? w00t now I can eat at happy burger! Weeee...  
  
James: Don't worry, I'm not crazy. Least, I don't think so... SKITTLES!  
  
Angela: I've gotta find my mama...Love you crazy lady bai bai.  
  
Angela stands up and begins walking towards the door  
  
James: Should I go with you? This town's dangerous. Now I know what you  
Meant back they're in the cemetery. Not to mention someone has my nachos imprisoned...and is trying to fake being my wife.  
  
Angela: I'll be okay by myself. Besides, I'd just slow you down. Like Maria will and she'll die 24 times WEEEEE (Swings knife around)  
  
James: What about that? You stupid bitch you were about to leave without giving me another weapon weren't you? =(  
  
James points to the butcher knife Angela is still holding  
  
Angela: Will you hold it for me?  
  
James: Sure. No problem. (Giggle)  
  
Angela: If I kept it.... I'm not sure what I might do. I might go on a killing rampage and make it into my own silent hill game. . then you'd be out of a job.  
  
James steps towards Angela and reaches his hand out to take the knife from Her. Angela steps back, screams, and points the knife at James  
  
Angela: No!! I'm sorry...I've been bad... Please don't...You know. I've always felt like Mary is watching me telling me not to kill you even though I really wanna. Oh well. Enjoy the knife! Skittles!  
  
Angela sets the knife on a stand before running out of the room laughing insanely. After Watching her leave, James walks over to the stand and picks up the knife in order to examine it  
  
==================================================== The brat. The fat guy. And the stripper. ====================================================  
  
After James makes his way out of the apartments, he walks down an alley and Comes across the same little girl that stepped on his hand earlier. She is Sitting on a wall that separates the apartments from the alleyway and is Humming.  
  
James: It was you, wasn't it? You're the one who stepped on my hand. You little bitch! C'mere and I'll give you that wedgie I was talking about!  
  
Little girl: *smiling* I don't know... Maybe I did...Why should I come to you? You old fart.  
  
James: What's a little girl like you doing here anyway?  
  
Little girl: Huh? Are you blind or something old fart?  
  
James: What's that letter? Give it to me you little hooligan!  
  
Little girl: None of your business.  
  
(The little girl stands up and begins to walk away)  
  
Little girl: You didn't love Mary anyway! YOU STUPID FREAKING OLD FART!  
  
James: Wait! How do you know Mary's name! And do you know where I can get some more cheesies! (Waves bowl around desperately)  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - James at the Entrance to Denny's parking lot - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
After going through a tunnel, James reaches a large brick sign with the Words "Denny's" on it  
  
James: I wonder if this is Rosewater Park....? Oh well....Mary? Could you be here?  
  
James makes his way somehow to Rosewater Park, he reaches an area That looks out onto the water(or what used to be the water). He sees a woman Looking out at the lake and makes his way towards her  
  
James: Mary?  
  
The woman turns around and smiles at James  
  
James: No... You're not....AHHHH CLONES! ZOMBIES STRIPPERS [Insert girly scream here]  
  
Woman: Do I look like your girlfriend? And will you stop screaming. I'm real.  
  
James: No.... my late wife. I can't believe it... You could be her twin. Your face, your voice... Just your hair and clothes are different. And you look like a hot hooker. Which my wife never did. Not even hot-hot.  
  
Woman: My name... is Maria. I don't look like a ghost. Do I? See? Feel how warm I am.  
  
Maria then takes James' right hand and places it on her chest. James backs away and pulls his hand away from Maria.  
  
James: You're really not Mary! Mary never had such huge knockers.  
  
Maria: I told you... I'm Maria. And will you use conmen sense for once? Ya weirdo.  
  
James: Sorry, I was confused. Bye bye!  
  
James begins to walk away from Maria in the direction he just came from.  
  
Maria: Where are you going you bastard?  
  
James: I'm looking for Mary. Have you seen her....you know you could stop being a bitch anytime now?  
  
Maria: Didn't you say she died...that means your available....(Giggle)  
  
James: Oh yeah... three years ago. But I got a letter from her. She said she was waiting in our 'special place'. She's a crazy loonie. But she's holding my nacho's hostage.  
  
Maria: And that's here? Anyway, I haven't seen her. Is this your only  
'Special place'? Boy you guys should have pictures or something.  
  
What looks to be an old black and white movie clip of Mary is shown. This Seems to be one of James' memories then it makes a buzz noise and James bonks his head.  
  
James: Well, there's the hotel, too, I guess. The one on the lake... I  
Wonder if it's still there. It was on a lake. And it had skittles. And candy and mars bars and everything! AND LOVE. Wooo.  
  
Maria: The Lakeview Hotel? Yeah, it's still there. So, the hotel was your 'special place', huh? I'll bet it was... could we go there and make love now James?  
  
James begins to walk away and Maria reaches out to grab his arm. [Insert James's girly scream here]  
  
Maria: Don't get so mad. I was just joking. Anyway, it's not that way.  
It's this way.  
  
Maria points in the opposite direction that James just came from. James Begins to walk away from Maria in the direction she just pointed. Maria Follows him and James looks back.  
  
James: You're coming with me? Go away you freaking bitch.  
  
Maria: You were gonna just leave me here?  
  
James: Yeah.....but...  
  
Maria: With all these monsters around?  
  
James: That was the plan. =D  
  
Maria: I'm all alone here. Everyone else is gone... I look like Mary,  
Don't I? You loved her, right?  
Or maybe you hated her...  
  
James: Yeah that's about right. ^_^  
  
James begins to walk away and Maria follows him.  
  
Maria: So it's okay?  
  
James: Yeah, fine. Just make sure to get killed by the traffic cone head guys.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - The Bowling Alley - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria eventually make their way to Pete's Bowl-O-Rama" from Rosewater Park. James begins to open the front door.  
  
Maria: I'll wait here. I hate bowling.  
  
James: Okay I'll see you tomorrow. .  
  
Maria: Aww...c'mon come baaack...  
  
James walks into the bowling alley and opens the only unlocked door into a Storage room.The scene cuts to Eddie and the little girl that James first Saw in the apartments. Eddie is sitting at a table eating pizza while the Little girl is sitting next to him on the table.  
  
Little Girl: So what'd you do? Robbery, murder? Look I've been charged with more then you can think of. Even four accounts of dead body rape.  
  
Eddie: Nah, nothing like that.  
  
Little Girl: Hah! You're just a gutless fatso!  
  
Eddie: Whadda you have to say that for? You're just a relentless bitch like Mary.  
  
Little Girl: I thought you said the cops were after you. Fatso. .  
  
Eddie: No, I just ran 'cause I was scared. I don't know what the cops are doing.  
  
Laura: But if you did something bad, why don't you just say you were sorry? Well... I guess I run away lots too. Like from that bastard James. That killed the only friend I had in the woooorld.  
  
Eddie: It's no good. They wouldn't listen. Nobody will ever forgive me.  
  
The scene cuts back to James in the storeroom, but Eddie's voice is still Heard talking to Laura.  
  
Eddie: Did ya find the lady you're looking for... What's her name... Mary? I wonder if she'll kill him. .  
  
James eventually finds his way into the room with Eddie and Laura. There, He finds Eddie still at the table eating pizza. However, the little girl is Gone from the table and not seen.  
  
James: Eddie?  
  
Eddie: Oh... umm, yer...that there dude. Cheesie man.  
  
James: James. We met in the apartment building you memory lodged fat bastard.  
  
Eddie: Yeah, I remember, but...where's your bowl of cheesies?  
  
James: Are you alone here, Eddie?...uhh with some slut outside.  
  
Eddie: Uh, no...That ball is my friend.  
  
A green bowling ball is shown rolling across the floor towards Eddie. Eddie And James both look at the bowling ball and then follow the direction it came From with their eyes. The little girl James met earlier in the apartments is Shown walking towards the exit door.  
  
Little Girl: Bye-bye fatman and wife killer!  
  
The little girl then walks out the door.  
  
James: Wait! Come back! Eddie! Let's go after her! Scooby dooo where are yooooh!?  
  
Eddie: Huh? Laura? But why...? She's a little bitch. .  
  
James: Laura? Is that her name? O_o  
  
Eddie: That's what the bitch said. Before she called me fat. And I ate pizza. ^_^ mmm skittleypizza.  
  
James: This town is full of monsters! How can you sit there and eat pizza!?.....Did you say skittles?  
  
Eddie: She said she was fine by herself... She said a fatso like me would just slow her down....(Munches on pizza)  
  
James: Forget you... Who is that girl anyhow?  
  
Eddie: I don't know. All I know is her name. I swear. Now go away you loser.  
  
James then exits to the bowling alley parking lot and finds that Maria is Gone from where she was standing when he entered. After he begins to walk Outside Maria comes jogging up to him panting.  
  
James: Did a little girl run out of here? I owe her a wedgie. -_- And where's my cheesie bowl.  
  
Maria: Yeah, she was too fast for me! Aren't you gonna go after her? You're such a bastard. I threw it at her and some zombie took it. .  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Alleyway behind Heaven's Night - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria eventually find there way to a small alleyway behind the Rear parking lot at Pete's Bowl-O-Rama. There, Maria points to a small gap Between the intersection of a brick building and a concrete wall.  
  
Maria: She went through there. Look you bastard.  
  
*James looks through the small gap and it is made obvious that there is no Way either he or Maria can fit through it.  
  
James: Is there any other way?...maybe I could shove you through that hole...  
  
Maria: Yeah, there is.  
  
Maria points to a metal door they passed leading into the brick building.  
  
Maria: Right through there. Now open it you pathetic loser.  
  
James then walks up to the door and tries to open it, but the knob on the Door won't turn.  
  
James: It's no good. It's locked. You stupid bitch why do you keep pointing me at doors that are locke-  
  
Maria then pushes James aside and starts pulling keys out of various areas Of her clothing and looks to be using them to unlock the door. It is not Made clear whether Maria is actually using several different keys or if she just uses one and is messing around with James by pretending to use several. When Maria has finished unlocking the door she steps aside and puts her hand out signalling James that he can go ahead and open it.  
  
(A/N: Here's where the long fricken chapter ends. I'll do chaseing Laura tomorrow or tonight.) 


	2. Following the brat and trying to do thin...

A/N: Tehehe...Yeah I'm lazy...very laaaaazy. But you'll still see more chapters. And more....AND MORE bwahahaa... Unless I run out of braincell's. Then your all left hopless. =D  
  
- - - - - - - - - - Following the brat. - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria eventually make their way out of Heaven's Night Club and Begin walking down one of the city streets. Once they have gone far enough Down the street, a clip is shown of Laura walking up the steps to a hospital Only a couple hundred feet from where James and Maria are standing.  
  
Maria: Over there,  
  
James: oooh... (Starring at a stripper poster)  
  
Maria points towards the hospital just before Laura enters the building. Also grabbing James's head and banging it agenst the wall helped a little.  
  
Maria Over there you jackass. .  
  
James: I have to go after Laura. I can't just leave her all alone.  
Also...maybe she'll be able to tell me something about my lost nachos...and skittles! KIDS ALWAYS HAVE SKITTLES! C'mon lets go!  
  
============================ BROOKHAVEN HOSPITAL ============================  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - Women's Locker Room and crazy brats. - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria eventually make their way to the women's locker room on the Third floor of the hospital. Sitting on a table in the room, James finds a Teddy bears and decides to pick it up and examine it.  
  
James: Ow!! God damned stupid fuc-  
  
James drops the teddy bear. Whining on and on  
  
Maria: What's wrong? You finaly pop a braincell bastard?  
  
James: I just pricked myself...and for all you know. I could have used this needle to poke you to death.  
  
Maria: Are you okay? (Giggle)  
  
James: Yeah. What about you, how about we go find a nice dirty slut bed to fit your royal pain in the butt. .  
  
James pulls a needle out of the bear's head and puts it in his pocket for later use  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - B. Maria Takes a Break - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria find their way to room on the second floor of the Hospital. James examines the room while Maria sits down on an old, dirty bed In the small room. She looks very tired and is slumped over.  
  
Maria: James, wait a minute....I SAID WAIT A MINUTE YOU STUPID MANACLIPTIC MORON!  
  
Maria coughs a couple of times. As James tried to make a get away but failed. And came back into the room.  
  
Maria: I'm kinda tired....I'm going to take these pills and have a nap. Make sure no zombies come to eat my brains.  
  
Maria produces a prescription bottle from her pocket, takes out a pill, and swallows it. James just shrugs and stares at her.  
  
Maria: It's just a hangover. Now go stand watch you bastard.  
  
James: You should rest. I'm gonna go away now. Bai bai.  
  
Maria lies down on the bed.  
  
Maria: Mmm. So comfy...I believe I said watch out for zombies.  
  
James: I'm going to go look for her... for Laura. I'll be back as soon as I can. Maybe tomorrow. Or..Three weeks for now. Okay bye. (Waves and walks out then comes back in)  
  
Maria: James, I wanna ask you something. What if... what if you can't find Mary? What will you do? Will you marry me?  
  
James: I haven't thought about that. And hell no. .  
  
Maria coughs a few times  
  
Maria: I'll be okay soon. Did you say something?  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - James finds the bitchy brat. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James walks into room on the first floor of the hospital, where he finds Laura on the floor between two beds playing with some teddy bears. She is Laughing and smiling, but hasn't noticed that James has entered the room.  
  
James: Laura? Heeey psycho kid who can't see zombies.  
  
Laura: Huh? You know my name? Are you with the FBI!? Fook you. .  
  
James: Eddie told me. Now c'mere! I have a wedgie sandwich for you kid.  
  
Laura: That big, fat blabbermouth. I should have murdered him along with the rest of the nacho clan that lived here! I'm queen of the zombies WOOO. Now go away and get eaten.  
  
James: How do you know about Mary? And why haven't you been eaten by the blood sucking zombies yet?  
  
Laura: What's the big deal you old fart?  
  
James: Why can't you just tell me you narcoleptic bitch?  
  
Laura: You gonna yell at me if I don't?  
  
James: No... I won't....[Yeah I will]  
  
Laura: I was friends with Mary... We met at the hospital. It was last year...we ate cheesies and played dominos and we did stuff and had sleepovers and we told ghost stories and and and-  
  
James: You liar!!  
*Apologetically*Laura, I...Just cannot believe....nah I can believe that Mary would be friends with a bitch like you.  
  
Laura: Fine! Don't believe me you non self-respecting bastard.  
  
James: But last year, Mary was already... I'm sorry Laura. Anyway, let's go. ON THE QUEST FOR THE HOLY GRA- wrong line. O_o  
  
Laura grabs her flashlight and begins to walk out with James.  
  
James: We can talk about this later. This is no place for a kid.  
There are all sorts of strange things around here...  
I can't believe you haven't even gotten a scratch on you. Do you have zombie repellent or something? Cause uhh that might come in handy.  
  
Laura: Why should I? Can't you just go get eaten already? Or go drive off a cliff?  
  
Laura and James walk out into the hospital hallway together. They are Walking through the hallway together when suddenly Laura reaches out and Begins to pull on James' arm in the opposite direction that they are Walking.  
  
Laura: Wait! Wait! I SAID WAIT YOU BASTARD There's something I gotta get!  
  
James: Later, okay? Now we have to leave before Maria the bitch gets better.  
  
James begins to start walking in the direction they were going again.a  
  
Laura: But it's really important! GOD DAMNIT STOP YOU HOMOPHOBIC BASTARD!  
  
James turns around to face Laura.  
  
James: What is it lassie? Timmy fall down the well?  
  
Laura: A letter from Mary. Its really important because I gotta bring you to a room and then lock you in and then you get attacked by zombies and I go running and Maria wakes up and you die and I win. Weeeee ^_^  
  
James: Huh?  
  
Laura: I wanna go get it? Is that okay? =D  
  
James: Yes, yes. Will we get skittles too?  
  
James and Laura walk down to a room with double doors near the end of the Hallway. Laura takes a key out from her pocket, unlocks it, and opens the Door.  
  
Laura: C'mon hurry up you bastard. I wanna win the game already!  
  
James looks into the dark room.  
  
James: Is it in there? It's really dark 'N stuff.  
  
Laura: Yeah. In the back. Waaaay in the back with the monsters and evil thingies.  
  
James begins to walk slowly into the room while Laura stands outside holding The door open.  
  
James: What're you doing, Laura? You getting some skittles for meh? ^_^  
  
Laura: (Giggle) yeah something like that, it's further back. In the desk.  
  
James continues walking cautiously into the room until he is standing in the Middle of it. Suddenly the door is slammed shut behind him.  
  
James: Laura, what are you doing!? You little bitch! LET ME OUT!  
  
James runs to the door and begins trying to open it, but the doors won't Move. Suddenly the mouth of some strange creature is shown.  
  
Laura: Ha-ha! I tricked you! I win you lose kiss a goat and fall in ooze!  
  
James: Open the door, Laura! THERES A THINGY BEHIND ME! [Insert girly scream of your choice here]  
  
Laura: Why should I? I'm a liar, right? Want me to open it? Huh? Huh? Do ya?  
  
James has turned his back to the door and is facing towards the center of the room. His hand is pounding on the door.  
  
Laura: What's the magic word?  
  
*All of a sudden a strange looking caged monster falls down and is hanging Off the ceiling.  
  
James: Laura! You stupid lieing fooktard! GET ME OUT OF HERE!  
  
Laura: Okay. I guess I won't open it... I think I'll just leave you like this... Have fun with Mr. caged zombie.  
  
James: You snotty little brat! Open up!  
  
Laura: Why you, you...  
  
James: Laura? Are you going to open up the d-  
  
Laura: You fartface! [Insert random word of insanity here]  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Slut in the basement, Girl gone missin - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James goes down to the basement and is about to begin climbing down a ladder Into the basement's basement when suddenly Maria walks through the door.  
  
Maria: James! YOU FUCKTARD! I thought I told you to not leave me in that room alone!  
  
James: Mary! Oh Maria it's you... I thought you were.... God why does the slut show up when I'm about to find out something?  
  
Maria shakes her head.  
  
James: Anyway, I'm glad you're alive. .....Not really you could've died for all the fartfaces in the world.  
  
Maria: *Angrily*"Anyway"!? What do you mean "Anyway"!?  
You don't sound very happy to see me. I was almost killed back  
There! Why didn't you try to save me? All you care about is that dead wife of yours! I've never been so scared in my whole life! You couldn't care less about me, could you?  
  
James: Pretty much.  
  
Maria: Then stay with me! Don't ever leave me alone! You're supposed to take care of me you bastard!  
  
Maria buries her face in James' shoulder, James tries to back away. Maria pulls back and begins talking to James again.  
  
Maria: So what about Laura? Did you find her?  
  
James: Yeah, but she ran away. Little fartnocker. .  
  
Maria: We've got to find her! She could've died for all you know?  
  
James: You really seem to care about her. Do you know her? Okay. You're supposed to be the reincarnation of Mary. Unless she's reeeaaaly alive your just a memory. So why can't you just go away you relentless bitch?  
  
Maria: I never met her before. I just feel sorry for her. She's all  
Alone... And for some reason... I feel like it's up to me to  
protect her. So pull out a shotgun and let's get rawkin!  
  
- - - - - - - - - - I hate gameshows.. - - - - - - - - - -  
  
While James and Maria are taking the elevator down to the second floor the Sound of a microphone screeching begins coming from James' radio. Gradually The reception of the radio becomes better and an audience is heard cheering Followed by an announcer's voice.  
  
Announcer: Hi there everybody thanks for tuning in. Welcome to another  
Exciting edition of "Trick or Treat"!  
  
*The audience is heard cheering.*  
  
James: WTF? I thought it was funny when I heard this in the bathroom but now here too?  
  
Announcer: Here you either answer the questions correctly and win a great  
Prize, or fail to answer correctly and receive the punishment.  
It all depends on you. And our lucky, or should I say unlucky,  
Challenger today is James! James Sunderland! Are you ready to?  
Play "Trick or Treat"?  
  
Okay, here's your first question. Merry-Go-Round, haunted house,  
roller coaster, ferris wheel and tea cups. Silent Hill is home  
to a thrilling amusement park that both children and adults love.  
The question is: What is the name of this amusement park?  
  
James: Farts in a handbag. Now go away. .  
  
Announcer: Okay, quickly on to question number two. Silent Hill witnessed a  
Gruesome murder a few years back. A brother and sister were  
Playing in the road when they were attacked and chopped into  
Pieces with an axe. Torn flesh, smashed bones, splattered blood,  
And finally... What a terrible tragedy. What a gruesome end to  
Such innocent lives.  
What was the name of the murderer who committed this vile act?  
  
James: It was I on a drunk Friday. Now go to hell and let us continue on our quest to kill my wife.  
  
Announcer: Now for our third and final question. South of the lake is a  
Deserted old neighborhood called South Vale. From they're to  
Paleville, the central resort area northwest of the lake, there's  
Only one road you can take. Just one road, no more.  
The third and final question is: What is the name of that road?  
  
James: James sunderlands amusement park of thrills spills and the GO THE FUCK AWAY BEFORE I KILL THIS RADIO WITH MY BARE HANDS!  
  
Announcer: Well, that's the last of our questions. Have you got it all?  
Figured out? When you know the answers, head to the storeroom on  
The 3rd floor to collect your prizes! But be careful. If you're  
Wrong....  
  
*The announcer laughs.*  
  
Announcer: Well then everybody, thanks for tuning in. See you again  
Sometime. Bye bye!  
  
*Audience is heard cheering and the radio begins to die out until it is Silent again.*  
  
Maria: What the fook was that?  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - The fridge that only the Dead can open. - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria make their way to the second floor Day Room. Near the Middle of the room is an old, metal refrigerator lying on its back.  
  
James: There's something that looks like a refrigerator. Maybe it has nachos inside! WOOOO  
  
James struggles to open the refrigerator grunting and pulling the handle With both of his arms.  
  
Maria: You can't open it? God James you've got girly arms.  
  
James: Yeah... Maria, gimme a hand here you narcotic bitch.  
  
Maria: Come on... You're supposed to be the big man around here...  
How's a little girl like me supposed to help? And you're supposed to be the hero of the game.  
  
Maria walks over to the refrigerator and both she and James pull on the handle. The refrigerator opens after only a couple of pulls. Maria reaches In the refrigerator and pulls out a small ring.  
  
Maria: What's this? Not very cute, is it? Looks like a cheap dollar store ring. .  
  
Maria hands the ring to James.  
  
Maria: Here James, you take it. It would ruin my good looks anyways.  
  
James: Thanks. Slut. -_-;  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - Praise the lord. The stripper's dead. - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James and Maria eventually find there way to another room in the basement. They are walking down a long hallway when suddenly Pyramid Head appears Behind Maria. They run down the long corridor until James reaches the Elevator. However, the elevator doors quickly begin to close after him and Maria is only able to fit her hand through the small gap in the doors. James Begins pulling on the doors attempting to open them.  
  
James: Open up! She was the only one who knew how to dress me except MARY!!  
  
James attempts to open the doors by pushing some of the buttons on the panel Within the elevator, but none of them work. Maria screams "James" a couple Of times.  
  
James: No!!...Oh well bye Maria. Have a nice trip to hell you slut whore bitch.  
  
Maria: James! You fucktard open the door! KILL THESE THINGS AHHH. Uh oh spaghetti-o's.  
  
Suddenly a large impact is heard from outside of the elevator where Maria is Standing. Maria's hand goes limp and falls back from the gap between the Doors.  
  
James: Maria.....oh well back to my thrilling adventure. ^_^  
  
The elevator doors close. And a Shrill munching noise is heard from the basement.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - On the Hospital Steps - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James walks through the hospital entrance onto the front steps.*  
  
James: Maria's dead. Big whoop. I couldn't protect her. Once again, I couldn't do anything to help Oh well, Laura has run off somewhere. Mary...You bitch. What...have you done to make me come here?  
What should I do? Are you here? There? In my underwear? Really waiting somewhere for me? Or is this your way of taking... I'm going to find Mary..... It's the only thing I have left to hope for...if I'm ever going to find my lost nachos..  
  
=======================================  
  
Is it almost over? My fingers are tired.  
  
=======================================  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - A Cafeteria Conversation with Eddie - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
After finding his way to the Silent Hill Historical Society, James ends up jumping down several holes in order to continue his journey. The second hole He jumps down leads him into a prison cafeteria where the following dialogue With Eddie takes place. James looks around the room and he eventually shines his light on Eddie. Eddie is sitting on the cafeteria floor holding a gun. James giggles  
  
Eddie: Killin' a person isn't no big deal. Just put the gun to their  
Head...POW! Like Kung POW. And Kentucky fried chicken.  
  
A dead body is shown slumped over a table next to where Eddie is sitting.......! WITH JAME'S BOWL OF CHEESIES [insert girly horror scream here]  
  
James: You... you killed him?....GOOD JOB! He had my cheesies. (Grabs cheesies and sits next to Eddie)  
  
Eddie: B,but... it wasn't my fault. He, he made me do it! The monkey made me do it. O_O  
  
James: Calm down, Eddie. Tell me what happened. Have you seen a bowl of nachos anywhere?  
  
Eddie: That guy... he, he had it coming! I didn't do anything. He just came after me! Besides he was making fun of me with his eyes! Like that other one...  
  
James: Just for that you killed him? Wow..You must have one cool dad to want to do that ^_^  
  
Eddie: Whadda ya mean 'Just for that'!  
  
James: Eddie, you can just kill someone cause of the way they looked at you...You RAWK! (Waves his hands in the air)  
  
Eddie: Oh yeah! Why not? Til now I always let people walk all over me. Just like that stupid dog. He had it coming too!!  
  
James: Eddie!! I WANT YOU'RE AUTOGRAPH!  
  
Eddie: He he. I was just jokin', James. He was dead when I got here.  
Honest. Anyway, I gotta run. Baaai.  
  
James: You're going out there alone? God speed little doogie.  
  
Eddie: Yeah.  
  
James: Eddie...your one cool dude. =D  
  
Eddie then walks out of the cafeteria.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - The slut lives. -_-; - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
After wandering through the beginning of the labyrinth, James finds Maria Sitting in a room. She looks to be unhurt and is casually sitting with her Hands in her lap. The room is divided by a set of prison bars with Maria Being on one side and James on the other.  
  
James: You're alive! Maria...! I thought that thing killed you...! Are you hurt badly? God damnit you stupid slut when will you learn to die?  
  
Maria: Not at all, silly. Now shut up.  
  
James: ...Maria? That thing... it stabbed you. There was blood everywhere. GOD DAMNIT I SAW YOU DIE YOU NICOTAIN BITCH!  
  
Maria: Stabbed me? What do you mean? Oh you're so silly....  
  
James: It chased us to the elevator. And then...You slipped and fell and died. And got killed.  
  
Maria: James, what are you talking about? Jesus you're a hobo. .  
  
James: Just before! Don't you remember? God damnit you're as forgetful as that stupid bitch Mary.   
  
Maria: James honey... Did something happen to you? After we got separated in that long hallway? Are you confusing me with someone else? *Laughs* you were always the forgetful one. Remember that time in the hotel...  
  
James: Maria...? Stop it your scaring me. (Whine)  
  
Maria: You said you took everything... But you forgot that videotape we made. I wonder if it's still there...  
  
James: How do you know about that! Aren't you Maria? OMG your that whore Mary aren't you?  
  
Maria: I'm not your Mary. (Giggle)  
  
James: So you're Maria? Maria....Maryia?  
  
Maria: I am... if you want me to be.  
  
James stands up. Giving Maria the finger  
  
James: All I want from you is an answer! YOU'RE A FUCKING LOONEY LIKE THAT GIRL AND THAT GUY AND ME AND THAT COP AND HARRY POTTER AND EVERYTHING!  
  
Maria stands up and moves closer to the bars.  
  
Maria: It doesn't matter who I am... I'm here for you, James.....As your new loving wife.  
  
Maria reaches through the bars and puts her hand on James' face.  
  
Maria: See? I'm real. Don't you want to touch me? Touch my chest and you'll find your answers.  
  
James: I don't know.... You're a whore with Mary's memories. And you're a slut....  
  
Maria: Come and get me. I can't do anything through these bars.  
  
James: Okay... stay right there. I'll come back tomorrow. Or...maybe in a couple of weeks.  
  
(A/N: Yaaay another chapter done...and I'm falling asleep here. WOOO....even though its like 4:42 PM lol) 


	3. End game Go home Eat nachos

A/N Boy....has it been a boring day. Mmm...the smell of waffles wafting.....no wait that's chicken. The smell of chicken wafting through the air....as I spend every waking minute trying to prefect these chapters. . Maybe for fun I'll forget to use spellcheck. Just kidding.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - Save the girl and Get yelled at. - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James makes his way through the labyrinth below the Historical Society. He begins walking down a hallway which has newspapers scattered all over the floor and stuck to the walls when he suddenly hears Angela yelling.  
  
Angela: No daddy! Please! Don't! I'LL GET THE FRIGGIN SKITTLES!  
  
James walks into the room he heard Angela yelling from. In the room he finds Angela sitting on the floor and a strange looking monster standing near her .James Giggles then shoots the monster until it lays motionless on The ground then walks over to Angela.  
  
James: Are you okay? Did you say something about skittles?  
  
Angela moans and then stands up and begins repeatedly kicking the monster. The monster growls. After this she picks up a television that is sitting in the room and drops it on the monster.  
  
James: Angela! Relax you nutcase.  
  
Angela: Don't order me around! You bastard!  
  
James: I'm not trying to order you. Why would I want to order from you. For all I know you don't have skittles. .  
  
Angela: So what do you want then? Oh I see, you're trying to be nice to me, right? I know what you're up to. It's always the same. You're  
only after one thing. (waves around her bra) WELL YOUR NOT GOING TO GET IT YOU BASHTARD!  
  
James: No, that's not true at all. I have plenty of bra's at home. Why would I need your dirty slutty one?  
  
James puts his hand on Angela's shoulder.  
  
Angela: Don't touch me!! You make me sick! SKITTLE NUT!  
  
Angela stands up and gains her composure once again.  
  
Angela: You said your wife Mary was dead, right? Dead? five feet under? Grave?  
  
James: Yes, she was ill...I smothered her with a pillow and she went away. Yaaay ^_^  
  
Angela: Liar! I know about you.... You didn't want her around anymore. You probably never found no one else.  
  
Angela walks out into the hallway shutting the door behind her as she leaves.  
  
James: That's ridiculous... I tried. The slut didn't help much...  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - Ding dong she's dead again. - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James finds his way through the labyrinth and eventually into the other side of the room that he spoke to Maria in earlier. When James walks in Maria is laying on the bed.  
  
James: Maria? Time to wake up and smell the rotting flesh bitch....eh?  
  
James begins to walk closer to the bed. There is some blood shown on the bed near Maria's arm.  
  
James: Maria...? Maria, no... What happened to you? Why... why..... WHY DIDN'T YOU DIE EALIER!?  
  
The camera pans up Maria's body from her feet and shows a large blood stain on the bed as it progresses up. Eventually Maria's face is shown. The left side of her face has been smashed in and is quite bloody. James sits down next to Maria's body, rests his elbows on the bed, and puts his hands over his face.  
  
James: Mary.......hmm....why do I keep saying Mary? Maybe its Mary who's the slut and Maria's the Phsycho one.  
  
James leaves the room. Then walks back in for no reason.  
  
James: There's nothing else for me in this room...Fooktard slut. .  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Final Meeting with Fatso - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James continues his journey through the labyrinth and comes to a small room that looks to be some type of freezer. Eddie is standing at one end of the room holding a gun and there are several dead bodies lying on the ground around him.  
  
James: Eddie! Man where have you been? What'cha doin now?  
  
Eddie: What does it look like? He always busted my balls.  
"You fat disgusting piece of shit! You make me sick!"  
"Fat-ass, yer nothin' but a waste of skin."  
"You're so ugly, even you're mama don't love you!"  
Well maybe he was right. Maybe I am nothing but a fat, disgusting piece of shit. But ya know what? It doesn't matter if your smart, dumb, ugly, pretty...it's all the same once yer dead. And a corpse can't laugh. From now on, if anyone makes fun of me... I'll kill em. Just like that.  
  
Eddie puts the gun to his head demonstrating the last statement he made. Eddie then turns around and begins to walk out of the room.  
  
James: Eddie, have you gone nuts? Mmm....nuts.....do you have any peanuts or skittles or M&M's around?  
  
Eddie slowly turns around.  
  
Eddie: I knew it. You too. You're just like 'em, James. =D  
  
James: Hey I didn't mean anything......I just wanted some skittles... =(  
  
Eddie: Don't bother. I understand. You've been laughin' at me all along, haven't you? Ever since we first met. I'll kill you, James.  
  
*Eddie raises his gun up, points it at James, and shoots. James dodges the bullet. James and Eddie then fight until Eddie flees into the next room. After James follows Eddie into the next room the following dialogue takes place.  
  
*James walks into some type of meat locker that has animal carcasses hanging throughout the room. Eddie begins speaking but James is unable to see exactly where he is in the room.*  
  
Eddie: Do you know what it does to you, James? When you're hated, picked on, spit on, just cause of the way you look. After you've been laughed at your whole friggin' life. That's why I ran away after I  
killed the dog. Ran away like a scared little girl. Yeah, I killed that dog. It was fun. It tried to chew its own guts out! Finally died all curled up in a ball. Then "He" came after me, I shot him too. Right in the leg. He cried more than the dog!  
  
James hears a loud bang and quickly turns around to see what's behind him. When he turns around nothing is there.  
  
Eddie: He's gonna have a hard time playing football on what's left of that knee.  
  
James: You think it's okay to kill people....I can't believe what I'm saying but.....I love you.  
  
Eddie: Don't get all holy on me, James. This town called you, too. You and me are the same. We're not like other people. Don't you know that?!  
  
Eddie finally walks out of his hiding place behind James. [Insert James's girly scream of your choice]  
  
Eddie: Let's party!  
  
Eddie and James then fight until Eddie falls to the ground...In a big heap of Spaghetti-o's.  
  
James: Eddie? Wow...did I really?  
  
James walks over to Eddie's body and looks over it. then picked up a stick and started pokeing the fat mass of flubber  
  
James: Eddie! I... I killed a... a human being... A human being...WOOO I RULE! I'm #1! I'M #1!!!......that was gay...  
Mary... Did you really die three years ago...? a better question would be....why am I talking to myself?  
  
================== PART 6: THE HOTEL ==================  
  
- - - - - - - A. The Dock - - - - - - -  
  
James makes his way out of the Historical Society, across Toluca Lake by rowboat,  
  
James: Row row row your boat fastly down the stream. Make sure that Mary dies before I get on scene. Weeeeee.  
  
and docks by the Lakeside Hotel. James gets out of the boat and looks up at the hotel.  
  
James: This place hasn't changed at all in three years... GOD DAMNED FLORIDA TOURISTS! (Shakes fist)  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - Crazy brat and her paper Of doom. Dun dun duuun...O_O - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James finds his way to the "Restaurant Lake Shore" in the hotel. When James begins to leave the room, a loud sound is heard from the piano. James looks over and Laura is hiding behind the piano hitting random keys.  
  
Laura: Did I scare you? Heeh...I see yellow stains on your jeans.  
  
James: Yeah, you did....and I uhh...spilt orange juice on my pants on the way over here. I also killed eddie if you must know. .  
  
Laura jumps out from behind the piano, walks past James and sits down on a chair near him.  
  
Laura: You're here to find Mary, aren't you, James? Well... have you? Ya lazy bastard what have you been doing then?  
  
James: No... is that why you're here, too? I want my nachos.  
  
Laura: She's here, isn't she? If you know where she is, tell me! I'm tired of walking. I know! Carry me!  
  
James: I wish I knew.....Koo koo katchu.  
  
Laura: But she said it in her letter...She said I could murder you.  
  
James: What letter!?  
  
Laura stands up, reaches in her pocket, and pulls out a letter. She extends her arm out towards James.  
  
Laura: ...Wanna read it?....I know its not much. And it wont change the fact that I'll murder you in the end. But oh well.  
  
James walks over and takes the letter from Laura.  
  
Laura: But don't tell that stupid fooking nurse that always was a bitch, okay?  
  
James: Who's Rachel? Better yet....who are you?  
  
Laura: She was our nurse. I took it from her locker. She's prolly a zombie that you killed already but oh well.  
  
James reads the letter and coughs and sneezes....and honks.  
  
"My dearest Laura, I'm leaving this letter with that bitch nurse to give to you after I'm gone. I'm far away now. In a quiet ugly bedroom on the top floor with no celing. Please forgive me for not saying goodbye before I left but that's just the lovely person I am.. Be well, Laura. Make sure to poison the the sisters. And Laura, about James... I know you hate him... It's true he may be a little surly sometimes, and he doesn't laugh much....Laura...make sure to stab James in the back with the butcher knife from the scary stabby stabby lady who lives in the strange hotel room. If things had worked out differently....I was hoping to kill him myself. If I don't in the end make a surprise random appearance at the end of the game. Happy 8th birthday, Laura. Your friend forever, Mary"  
  
When James finishes reading the letter, Laura is drawing pictures on a fogged up window leading out onto the restaurants porch.  
  
James: Laura... How old are you? Ahaha......I feel so happy now....She's in this fooking building and woooo. Now wheres the crazy stabby girl?  
  
Laura: Um, I turned twenty last week.  
  
James: So Mary couldn't have died... three years ago... Could she really be here? Is this the "quiet, beautiful place" she was talking about? And better yet...Does she have my nachos?  
  
Laura: Me and Mary talked a lot about Silent Hill. She even showed me all her pictures. She really wanted to come back. That's why I'm here. Maybe you'll get it if you see the other letter... The one Mary...huh?  
  
*Laura reaches in her pockets and can't find the other letter.*  
  
Laura: I must have dropped it! God damnit I must have stored it in eddie's brain!  
  
James: Laura...when will you hooligans learn to not play with people's heads?  
  
Laura: I gotta find it! I'll be back stupid fatso.. .  
  
Laura runs past James and out of the room.  
  
James: Laura! GET ME SOME CHEESIES! (Munches on the last cheesie in the plastic bowl he was carrying)  
  
- - - - - - - Room 312 - - - - - - -  
  
James eventually makes his way into room 312 where he plays the video that he and Mary forgot in the hotel 3 years ago. Once the video begins to play, Mary is shown standing next to one of the windows in room 312.  
  
Mary: Are you taping again? C'mon... You bastard put it down and start killing me already. . I wanna come back and haunt you noooow.  
  
Mary sits down in a chair next to the window and looks out.  
  
Mary: I don't know why, but I just love it here. It's so peaceful. You know what I heard? This whole area used to be a sacred place. I think I can see why. It's too bad we have to leave... Please promise you'll take me again, James.  
  
Mary begins coughing. The video starts to become gritty and it looks as though the footage of Mary has been copied over some other footage. Eventually a shaky picture of Mary is shown, lying in bed. James walks up to the bed and looks over her and giggles insanely. He leans over and seems to be talking to her, although there is no audio. Suddenly James reaches for the pillow behind Mary's head. The video footage then becomes very scrambled showing bits and pieces of the footage in room 312 as well as some other very grainy footage of James at Mary's bedside. The grainy footage seems to show James smothering Mary, although it is so unclear it is hard to tell. Eventually the video footage ends and there is only static shown on the television. James is then shown sitting in a seat in front of the television with his head down. Giggling until Jessie hits him over the head and he sulks, James says Mary's name He stays in this position for quite a while until Laura walks into the room. She walks between James and the television and then stands there and begins talking to James.  
  
Laura: So there you are, James. Did you get the letter? Did you find Mary? If not, let's get going already. C'mon you bastard get up.  
  
Laura pushes James' shoulders.  
  
Laura: Okay? GOD DAMNIT CAN YOU HEAR ME YOU NARCOTIC BASTARD OF SORTS!? ARE YOU A FUCKING DEAF PERSON!?  
  
James looks up.  
  
James: Mary's gone. She's dead.....I killed her. YAY ^_^  
  
Laura: Liar! That's a lie! SHE'S HERE!  
  
James: No, that's not true...I smothered her with a pillow and I'll do the exact thing again and then to Maria. Becuz she sucks. And she's a slut. Just like Mary. (Giggle)  
  
Laura: She... she died 'cause she was sick?....Gross bastard. Did she spin her head around and throw up? =D  
  
James: No. I killed her. Plaaain and simple. ^________^  
  
Laura waits a while before responding.  
  
Laura: You killer! Why'd you do it?! I hate you!! I want her back! Give her back to me! ARE YOU LISTENING GIVE HER BACK YOU FOOKING WIFE KILLER!  
  
Laura pushes James' shoulder.  
  
Laura: I knew it! You didn't care about her! I hate you, James! YOU'RE A ZOMBIE! ZOMBIE ZOMBIE ZOMBIE ZOMBIE ZOMBIE!!!!  
  
Laura hits James' shoulder several times screaming zombie too  
  
Laura: I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!  
She was always waiting for you... why... why...God now I feel like a smoke can we cut the scene for a little bit I hate depress-  
  
Jessie: NO! keep doing this scene...its jessies favie.   
  
James shakes his head back and forth while looking down.  
  
James: I'm sorry...Bitch. .  
  
James stands up.  
  
James: They Mary you know isn't here. She's upstairs. Not in this room. Now go home and fuck a teddy bear.  
  
Laura walks out of the room.  
  
James: Laura, I'm sorry....I didn't use my shotgun on you when I had the chance.  
  
James slumps back down in the chair. Suddenly, Mary's voice can be heard over the radio, although it is quite staticy. [Insert Nother Random girly scream from James here]  
  
Mary: James. Where are you? I'm waiting. I'm waiting for you. Please come to me.....You bastard. Come here or the nachos................ get thrown into the water........... for the zombies.  
  
James stands up.  
  
Mary: Do you hate me? Is that why you won't come?.......God why did I even mary a fooktard like you.  
  
James: That voice...so...familiar....  
  
Mary: Please hurry. Are you lost? I'm near. I'm waiting nearby, James. Please. I want to see you, James. Can't you hear me? James...  
Please, James... James... James... James...Jay lenno..lenno...lenno lenno lenno lenno lenno.  
  
The radio finally dies out. And James sneezes.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Death to the new wife. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James makes his way through a door to a room where there should be a metal staircase, but when he walks in there is a wooden, carpeted staircase and the whole room is on fire. Angela is standing on the staircase looking at a strange picture on the wall. James walks up the staircase to talk to Angela. Angela turns around and faces James.  
  
Angela: Mama! Mama, I was looking for you. Weeee (giggle)  
  
Angela walks towards James, while James backs away from her.  
  
Angela: Now you're the only one left. Maybe then.... Maybe then I can rest....in Reeces pieces.  
  
James continues to back away from Angela.  
  
Angela: Mama, why are you running away?....is it possible your proposal ealier was false wasn't it mama?  
  
Angela puts her hands on James' face, then on his shoulders, and then back on his face. She examines his face closely and then backs away. Tossing skittles at James  
  
Angela: You're not Mama. It's you... I, I'm sorry...oh were we supost to get married or something?  
  
James: Angela, no....nooooo....yeah..nooo.  
  
Angela: Thank you for saving me... But I wish you hadn't. Even Mama said it... I deserved what happened...I can't marry ya. Oh well.  
  
James: No Angela, that's wrong! NOOO I WANNA MARRY YOU! YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS SKITTLES (Cries)  
  
Angela: No. Don't pity me. I'm not worth it....(sighs and tosses skittles at James again)  
  
The tone of Angela's voice suddenly changes. And the skittles turn black.  
  
Angela: Or maybe you think you can save me? Will you love me? Take care of me? Heal all my pain?  
  
James: Nah...Just wanted a beer bringer and a skittle buyer..  
  
Angela: That's what I thought. James. Give me back that knife. I want my stabby stabby thingie back Mama.  
  
Angela reaches her hand out towards James.  
  
James: No... I, I won't. you're the only one who doesn't think that I'm stripper food. O_O  
  
Angela: Saving it for yourself? Oh well. Guess I'll walk into the flames...  
  
Angela begins to walk up the fiery staircase.  
  
James: Me? No... I'd never kill myself....  
It's hot as hell in here. (Takes off clothes so that He's in his boxers) whew....Ow still hot. Hot hot pants.  
  
Angela: You see it too? For me, it's always like this. Seeya funny lady I love you bai baaaai.  
  
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - The slut is alive....AND NOW SHE DIES - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
  
James walks into the middle of a strange room and then hears Maria's voice calling out to him.  
  
Maria: James! You fucktard you left me to die again! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN! Now its time to kill you.  
  
When he looks up he sees Maria and two Pyramid Heads on top of a platform. Maria is being held upside down in some type of metal contraption and there is a Pyramid Head on either side of her.  
  
James: Stop! Leave her alone! Leave us both the hell alone!....wait...nevermind go ahead. Goooo PH's! kill the slut!  
  
One of the Pyramid Heads rams a spear through Maria's back, presumably killing her. After seeing this, James drops to his knees.  
  
James: I was weak. That's why I needed you.... Needed someone to punish me for my sins.... But that's all over now.... I know the truth.... Now it's time to end this.....PRAISE THE LORD'AH  
  
James then fights both the Pyramid Heads.  
  
===================== End game. Bitch dies. =====================  
  
- - - - - - - - - - The slut is the bitch. - - - - - - - - - -  
  
After climbing a long set of metal stairs, James finds his way into a strange room with no ceiling and a metal floor. There is a bed sitting near the middle of the room. A woman who looks like Mary is looking out the window. James walks up to the woman at the window.  
  
James: Mary! Time to end this you sluttish whore bitch.  
  
The woman turns around and she and James look at each other for a short time.  
  
Maria: When will you ever stop making that mistake! Mary's dead. You  
killed her. Oh god you were so fooled  
  
James: Maria...? It's you... But I don't need you anymore. I've got Laura. =D  
  
Maria: What? You must be joking! But I can be yours... I'll be here for you forever. And Laura's a lieing slut.  
  
Maria walks towards James.  
  
Maria: And I'll never yell at you or make you feel bad. That's what you wanted. I'm different than Mary... How can you throw me away?  
  
James: I understand now. It's time to end this nightmare. DIE YOU SLUT! (Shoots his shotgun at the sky) Yee-haaaw.  
  
Maria: No! I won't let you! You deserve to die too, James. You stupid Fucktard hillbilly!  
  
Maria then transforms into the final boss and she and James fight. After James has caused enough damage to her, she falls to the ground, but is still alive. Maria will repeat James' name over and over again until she is finally killed by one last blow.  
  
After Maria is killed the scene switches. James is sitting next to Mary's bed in what is probably their home. Its not likely though.  
  
James: Mary..Why do we have to do this scene over again?  
  
Jessie: BECAUSE I SAID SO!  
  
Mary coughs a couple of times.  
  
Mary: James...You stupid hobo.  
  
James: Forgive me...I loved you when you weren't a dried up prune. I thought that Maria could replace you...but I was wrong. She was a slut and you are a bitch and Laura was the only one for me.  
  
Mary: I told you that I wanted to die, James. I wanted the pain to end. And what are you talking about?  
  
James: That's why I did it, honey. I just couldn't watch you suffer.  
No! That's not true... You also said that you didn't want to die. The truth is I hated you. I wanted you out of the way. I wanted my life back....and my nachos...  
  
Mary: James... if that were true, then why do you look so sad? And will you shut up about those nachos? I threw them away a few weeks ago. .  
  
James: Mary...You're the stupidest person I've ever seen in my entire life. More a of a whore bitch slut. (Smothers Mary with the pillow)  
  
Mary: (Muffled) James... Please... please do something for me.  
  
Mary reaches at her side and grabs a letter and then hands it to James.  
  
Mary: Go on with your life. And leave me alone you stupid slut using bastard.  
  
The scene switches to a foggy grave yard and Mary begins to read her letter to James. To see what the letter says skip down to the "D. The Letter" portion of this document. After the letter has been read James and Laura are seen walking through the graveyard together. After this, the scene fades to black ........and Maria and James are shown walking up the steps and through the parking lot towards James' car. Once Maria and James get about halfway from the steps to the car Maria begins Coughing....AND THEN....James opens the door and the room is shown. It is a brightly lit and very colorful room. There are several computerized devices throughout the room and at the back end of the room there is what looks to be a control panel. There is a dog at the control panel with a headset on pulling various levers back and forth. Also at the control panel, there is a monitor with pictures of James and Maria shown on it. After looking over the room, James says "So it was you all along" in Japanese and then drops to his knees. After this the dog comes over to James and starts licking his face.....THEN James continues to row the boat until he disappears behind the island. The screen then fades to black and the credits roll  
  
Jessie: Well that's it. Three chapters. Two days. And I'll be making more. Count on it. . Tee hee.. 


End file.
